Dining With Etiquette

The Invitation

Invitations should be issued in a manner that should plainly inform you as to whether your company is requested or if you may bring a guest. If a formal invitation is issued “…for the presence of your company…” and does not further indicate that you may bring a guest, you should assume that the invitation is for one. It is poor taste to contact the host/hostess and “hint” for approval to bring a guest. Often when the invitation is for a small party or a large food function, there will be space or price considerations to be dealt with and limitations must be imposed by the host/hostess. It puts the invited party in an awkward situation to say the least. Whenever put in this position, they must either continually increase the number of invited guests or decide to stick to the original list and risk having you opt not to attend.

RSVP

• Repondez, s’il vous plait
• Respond if you please
• Kindly give me an answer
• The favor of a reply is requested
• Tell me if you’re comin’

No matter how you interpret the message, PLEASE respond! You’ll realize just how important a response is when the first party/event you host requires knowing in advance how many guests will be attending.

Breaking Various Engagements

There are social engagements that may be broken, and there are those that may not. These rules apply to any commitment – whether it is pleasure or business. When a commitment is broken it sends a message of total disregard and often there are embarrassing consequences to suffer for using poor judgement.
In the matter of dining engagements, the following may not be broken under any circumstances short of sudden death:

• Seated dinners for ten or fewer people.
• Dinners at which you have been requested by the host to help entertain a difficult guest.
• Restaurant meals when you have promised to meet one other person and cannot notify him or her that you will not be there.
• Theater engagements when tickets are especially hard to obtain.
• Any written invitation that you have RSVP of your attendance.

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